TheMcGyver
Family · September 20254/10
If you have ever wondered what it is like to live inside a highway, book this place. The windows are so acoustically useless that you will be serenaded by traffic at 5 a.m. sharp, whether you asked fo...If you have ever wondered what it is like to live inside a highway, book this place. The windows are so acoustically useless that you will be serenaded by traffic at 5 a.m. sharp, whether you asked for a wake up call or not.
The bathroom is its own comedy act. You cannot turn on the light without flooding the entire room with fluorescent glory. Perfect if you enjoy midnight interrogations every time someone uses the toilet.
The hotel claims to be tech savvy with handy QR codes, but the one thing you actually want, the Wi Fi, is missing. I gave up, resigned to life without internet, possibly becoming a better person, but mostly just annoyed.
In a moment of weakness I braved the QR system to order room service. Half an hour later I checked the app to find no evidence of my order, so I phoned reception just to be sure. This small act was met with instant hostility, as though daring to confirm my food existed was a personal insult. When the meal did arrive, it came in a paper bag, featuring the worst carbonara I have ever seen: noodles floating in water with a half cooked egg tossed on top. All served on paper plates with wooden cutlery. It might have been funny if I had not been charged a premium for the experience.
The air conditioning is like NASA control panel meets tractor engine. Loud, baffling, and guaranteed to keep you awake just in case the traffic did not.
On booking it proudly claims to have a 30 metre pool. Spoiler alert, it does not.
To be fair, the staff were genuinely friendly in passing, and the location is decent for exploring. But we have stayed in several hotels nearby, and this one proudly takes the crown as the worst of the lot. A true overachiever in disappointment.Show More